OMG... again!!!

I am so sorry, I am not sure anyone is even interested, but at this point, I need to unload the fury. 

I have been watching my cell phone bill in the last couple weeks.  Husband spent a good hour on the phone with his ex-wife again this morning and all of my anxiety has come flooding back.  Only this time I am not just hurt and anxious, I am fucking pissed.

I have never told him that I know they have been talking.... didn't want to add fuel to the fire.  And I figured two things:  a) if they just talked a couple times, then I am making a big deal of nothing.  b) they have kids together, of course they are going to talk.

But this is the thing: 

Three phone calls, coincidentally at the same time he tells me he is unhappy in our marriage.

One 30 minutes, one 60 minutes, 50 minutes today. (Yes, I am going to yell!))
THIS IS THE MAN WHO IS SO BENT ON WORKING HIS ASS OFF ON THAT HOUSE THAT HE WONT SPEND 10 MINUTES ON THE PHONE WITH ME BECAUSE HE WANTS TO GET BACK TO WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now the way I see it, if their conversations are all about their son coming home from Japan, he would come home and tell me that she called and they talked today.  BUT HE HASN'T SAID A WORD.

The man needs to understand one thing.  He is married to ME, not her.  If he is unhappy, he needs to be talking to ME, not her.   I understand they have been friends since they were teenagers. But that should have changed the day he put a ring on my finger.  And if he doesnt want to talk to me, then there are so many other people he could and should talk to. 

The other thing that pisses me off is that she is on my Facebook account. No, we are not great "friends." But friendly, and civil to one another.  Hey, call me crazy.  But the kids dont need us to be at each others throats.  And, it gives us a neutral forum to talk..... it used to be that she would give me updates on the kids if needed, and I would pass them on to my husband. (She wont call our house at night when it is honest because geeee..... her husband doesnt like it any more than I do.)  So on my facebook page, she keeps commenting on things and acting like she isn't going behind my freaking back.  

So now, I don't know what the hell.  Just when I was starting to feel some hope, I am all messed up again.  I think I need to talk to him, because I can't keep letting him think it is OK.  Right now, I am torn.  I am sick to my stomach.  His sister is going to call me back in about 30 minutes and talk me through this.  But I really want to get in the car and drive over to the house to ask him WHAT THE HELL???????????? 

Really??? Am I asking so much??

I am going to have a come-apart!!!!!!!!!

On Tuesday, I was in desperate need of a long hot bubble bath, but I got called to do a newspaper story, so I spent the afternoon working, and my opportunity was lost. 

So yesterday, I REALLY needed that hot bath. Not to mention the greasy hair, hairy legs and other "ewwwww" factors.  Instead, I got 2 minutes in an ankle-deep tub of cold water. Skip the hair and wash what I have to.... because my daughter got the luxury of a long, leisurely hot shower. 

Therefore TODAY........ I told her in no uncertain terms that mom gets the bathroom first. PERIOD. 

But if you think I am freshly bathed and relaxed, think again!!! 

It takes a long time for the hot water to actually get hot and get up the stairs to my tub, so you usually have to start it and give it time to heat.  Which I did.  And then I put in a few pumps of Lavender and Chamomile bubble bath that my step-daughter sent me for Christmas.  And then I waited for my tub to fill so I could sink into a hot tub of goodness. 

Well, that won't be happening. 

Because yours truly failed to flip the switch to plug the drain.  And while I was waiting for my tub to fill, all of that hot water went right down the effing drain.

I am not sure what makes me more angry -- that once again I am gypped of my bubble bath, (I really do have things I should be working on, not lounging in the tub all day long!) or that this time it is my own damn fault... can't even blame the teenager this time.

I JUST WANTED A HOT BATH.... IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK!?