I am so sorry, this is Blog Post #4 today. But -- no one else to talk to at the moment.
I am freaked out about the possibility of a slipped band. I would really like to talk to my husband about it. But today has been one of those days. He spent the day working on the house. He got home..... I had to leave for a baby shower. In the 2 minutes I got to talk to him, it was all about the house. I couldn't get a word. I got home from the baby shower, and the first thing was all about how the computer didn't work STILL.
I probably wasn't very nice to him. I told him I am DONE with that computer -- I tried to do what I could to fix it. And then I took it to the shop. But I feel like everything I have done isn't good enough, like he is second guessing every move I make with it. I am not a computer geek. I am sick of trying to struggle through the thing to figure it out.
Remember when I said I am not good at this newlywed stuff?
Remember when I said I am not good at this newlywed stuff?
He said he didn't mean that it was my fault. But I can also tell he isn't happy with me and my attitude. So he is in the shower and I am here with my laptop feeling like an ass. For half a second I stopped to wonder why I get so damn defensive. But I am tired. I am still freaked out about the band and I don't really want to get into any heavy thinking right now. I am tired and I am coming down with a cold. And when I get a cold, it very quickly turns to bronchitis if I am not super careful. And I am really just whining at this point.
There are times we all get this way! I think the fact that you can see when you get defensive even if it is after the fact means that you will work on it! There is no right way to be a newlywed. Our whole life is a learning process. Chin up!
ReplyDeleteWell, while I was drying the dishes, it occurred to me that in Marriage #1... EVERYTHING was my fault,even when it wasn't. My ex found a way for everything to be about me.
ReplyDeleteAfter five years of divorce, I thought I had got over all that. Funny how it takes a second try at marriage to figure out I am still carrying a lot of baggage.
I haven't been married before I married my husband, but my husband has a lovely ex-wife (was that sarcasm? Oh, yes it was). It really used to hurt my feelings when he would basically think that I would act like SHE did about certain things. After 8 years of marriage, he's pretty much over that, but it was hard at first. So I'm sorry you've been having a tough time with it. I hope you get to feeling better soon and I'll be sending non-slip thoughts!
ReplyDeleteThat's what we're here for! Bitch away! We can take it!
ReplyDeleteSorry for all the stress. Sometimes it helps to just say that you are overwelmed with worry about the band and you aren't trying to take it out on anyone, but you need some understanding.